Saturday, July 24, 2010

Ode to the Neon - a goodbye to my 15 year old car.

Ode to the Neon

It's been 15 years since I bought my Neon, versus a lease,
She had no special features, not even a trunk release.

She was nicknamed the "Smartie" because of her colourful hue,
And I will truly miss her as a bid her adue.

Good times were had in the early years,
Before the carbon monoxide fumes brought me to tears.

A little bit of BC travelling she did go,
And for two years endured the harsh Ontario winter snow.

As my lengthy commute went on, many hand gestures we endured,
Me? Driving Fast? That's just absurd.

One day a spilt bag of bird seed and a week of rain after that,
Not before long, my back seat mats had germinated live plants.

There were stickers a plenty to make her stand out,
"Island Girl", "Rollergirl", and a big "Hydro" one for 2 hour parking clout.

And if the back seat could talk with no word of a lie,
It would say it easily holds a 6'4" rugby guy.

She's even met a celebrity--it was all good,
We hit Johnny Knoxville on Seymour--he left a dent in our hood.

Soon we left oil in every spot that we went,
She's single-handedly to blame why the Ozone is spent.

The smell inside her was sometimes too much to bear,
Surely I couldn't have been the only living organism in there.

In the later years, the dust piled up,
And so did all the sh*t in her trunk.

And full she was, no room for one little bit,
My passengers always watching me move things so they could sit.

When my dog entered the scene, he was quite hairy you know,
So everyone who sat in her had a little Bodie to show.

I ran her hard, almost 400,000 clicks,
But the odometer had stopped working, and the dash lights flicked.

We had an understanding, she and I,
And I always talked to her with a watchful eye.

For trash talking she did not like,
As I discovered each time I had to call BCAA on Granville in the middle of the night.

But soon came a few dangerous rides that were scary at best,
And I knew right then and there I had to put her to rest.

So I say to you sweet car as I think fondly back of our days,
Apart you will be picked, but still loved by she who is crazed.

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